Tag Archives: humor

Dragon Not Even Trying?

Sometimes, Dragon NaturallySpeaking is so far off in its translation of my words that I’m tempted to think it’s messing up on purpose.  Like on this one, in which I was describing a bit part performance my daughter had in … Continue reading

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Profitable Prophets

More voice recognition errors offering proof that we are still smarter than PCs: What I actually said to my computer: I’ve been in nonstop meetings How my voice software translated it:  I’ve been announced up meetings. Common sense helps the … Continue reading

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Copping a Calculation

Here’s another voice recognition error that fits the category of, “Thank goodness, I caught this one before hitting “send”: What I actually said to my computer: my second calculation How my voice software translated it: my second copulation After all, … Continue reading

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Departmental Dishonesty

Sometimes, an incorrect translation makes a better message than what the voice recognition software user actually said. For example, in describing a business need that affected the entire department in a large company I worked at, Dragon NaturallySpeaking mixed the … Continue reading

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The Offensive Young Vendor

This recent voice recognition error occurred while using Dragon NaturallySpeaking to type up a report – a comparative analysis of large vs. small service firms. What I actually said to my computer: a relatively small and young vendor… How my … Continue reading

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Seize the Residents!

What I actually said to my computer: He sees the residents How my voice software translated it:  He seized the residence More proof that I cannot send out e-mails composed via voice recognition software without reviewing them carefully first.  And … Continue reading

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Dorky Mothers and the Delhi Metro

As I’ve mentioned previously, Dragon sometimes struggles with people or place names: What I actually said to my computer: with Martha first How my voice software translated it:  with Mark the First This one exemplifies the problems of doing voice … Continue reading

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Those Valued Male Cows

What I actually said to my computer: valuable How my voice software translated it:  buy you a bull

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Gay Day and Sex for Six

Some of the voice recognition errors in today’s post are off color, so don’t read this if you feel you may be easily offended. Reminder:  these are software blunders, not anything intentionally inappropriate that I typed.  But I admit, I … Continue reading

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Just Your Standard Rape, Nothing Special

Sometimes, the translation is not just wrong, but seriously embarrassing.  Here are two recent voice recognition errors that stood out: What I actually said to my computer: We’re having trouble with our e-mails. How my voice software translated it:  We’re … Continue reading

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Thoroughly Thoreau

Two fresh-off-the-vocal-press voice recognition errors: What I actually said to my computer: reasonable, accurate, and thorough advice How my voice software translated it:  reasonable, accurate, and Thoreau advice That one actually slipped by unnoticed.  The e-mail recipient later told me … Continue reading

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No Respect for the Purple Prayers of Tatian

More voice recognition shenanigans, courtesy Dragon NaturallySpeaking: What I actually said to my computer: A voice of respect How my voice software translated it:  Avoid some respect What I actually said to my computer: in prayerful obedienceHow my voice software … Continue reading

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Phonetically Speaking, It Should Make Sense…

Normally, it’s easy to understand how voice recognition software misunderstands spoken words, such as when… I said to my computer:      …and a spare in your purse And my computer wrote:  …and despair in your purse After all, there’s a good … Continue reading

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What’s In a Name? Anyone’s Guess With Voice Recog. Software

Most commercial voice recognition programs have developed to the point that they handle standard language and sentences fairly accurately.  But I find that even the king of ‘em, Dragon NaturallySpeaking, still blunders with names.  Here are a few examples I’ve … Continue reading

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Just Stripping Along Down the Road…

And speaking of Dragon NaturallySpeaking having trouble with names, here’s a classic example of why you must reread your voice-recognized writing before showing it or sending it.  A slight misunderstanding by the software can create gross misunderstandings in the workplace: … Continue reading

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